Where We Are Today

In writing this blog, I hope that families who are facing putting loved ones in assisted living or long term nursing care don’t make the mistakes that we did. I will chronicle our story over the past 12 years, more specifically the last two years, and how we were blindsided by a legal system that is vague and inconsistent. Because of our nativity and trust in the system our family could be homeless in the next two months.

Over the past 12 years, The cost of Jean’s care has been close to $900,000.00, exhausting all finances and now jeopardizing the house that Jean had setup in a trust for Charles back in 2006. We have lived in the home for 19 years and now face being evicted by the Trustee of her estate. I will explain the details in future posts of our two year court battle with the nursing home facility and attorneys over guardianship and trustee control that we have lost, and now face eviction from the current Trustees for the home we have paid for and maintained all the years.

We have learned that it doesn’t matter if you are the only family, it can all be taken away by a system that is so intertwined by the nursing homes and attorneys that we never had a chance. I’m not saying we didn’t make mistakes, but we always made sure Jean was taken care of. In my next post, I’ll outline the 12 year journey, but for now, keep us in your thoughts.

Charles and Susan Murray

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February 2023 - May 2023

The Guardian never contacted us, even after we received the official “Order” from the court in December 2022. Meanwhile, the funds were adding up in Jean’s account with no payments being made to the nursing facility. I called the facility in December and they wouldn’t divulge any information to me concerning Jean’s financial obligation to them, they wouldn’t even tell me if she had enough personal funds in the account for hair, nails, etc., and they had to get permission from the Guardian to tell me that. We did not realize it at the time but the Guardian was having all Jean’s mail that was going to our address forwarded to them, so we were not seeing any bills from the nursing home, but they were and they didn’t do anything about getting them paid. They never told us they had her mail forwarded they had absolutely no contact with us. In early February 2023 we were served with a “Motion To Appoint Guardian Of The Estate As Trustee Of Ward’s Revocable Trus...

January 2005

In this post, I am going to briefly review the course of events from January 2005 - August 2011. This was prior to Jean entering assisted living. From the beginning of our relationship in 2004, Jean was very involved in our life. She was always a very controlling woman, especially over Charles, her only son. A lot of you don’t know this but Charles suffers from an auto immune disorder and he has been on disability since 1999. In 2005 Charles and I decided to move in together and we rented the home we currently live in. After a year, we all talked about the possibility of us buying a home in the North Raleigh area. Jean wanted to make sure that Charles always had a home to live in. After looking at several homes, we approached the owner of the home we were renting and it closed in July 2006. Jean has a revocable living trust, and the home was put into the trust. In part, this was what Jean thought was best to do to prot...

Our Deadline to Vacate is Tomorrow

It's been a few weeks since my last blog update. We have made a little progress with our new attorney, who has contacted the Successor Trustee. We are doing everything we can within the legal system to stay in the house. We don't know if somebody will serve us eviction papers or if the Trustee will work with us to let us pay the monthly expenses. The reason the Successor Trustee wants to sell the home is to settle the previously discussed debt owed to the nursing home; this is something that we have been waiting since October 2023 for the attorney of the nursing home to finish up a settlement agreement that would hold only Charles and myself responsible for the debt. The second reason is that they want Trustee Fees of over $10,000.00 paid. They also stated that we can't afford to live there, which I find ironic considering we have been living in the home for 19 years, and they have never even approached us to discuss a monthly payment amount. It's been almost a year si...

Blindsided

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